#im awake and we are so fucking BACK
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status: open! @valpostart location: casablanca blooms & coffee
it had been a while since salem left the house, she'd been recluse lately for a couple reasons. she was finally to the point where being home was starting to get old and she needed to get out of her head and be around other people. after spending some time out and about (which included spending money on things she didn't need at secondhand style) she found herself at casablanca blooms and coffee. what was supposed to be a quick coffee run turned into an hour of her being scribbling in her journal at one of the empty tables. "if you wanna join me you can, i really could use the company." she said with a smile to the familiar face a few feet away.
#im awake and we are so fucking BACK#pls lemme know if we haven't plotted i'll dm you!!!#or assume connections we ball either way ahhh#valpohqstart
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OOH YEAH BABY ITS THE SURGERY EPISODE BABY!!! ME AND THE HOMIES NEED SOME NEW FACES FOR OUR NEW PLAN, AND WHO BETTER TO GET THE JOB DONE THAN THE TWO MOST EVIL PEOPLE WE'VE EVER HAD THE MISFORTUNE OF HAVING OUR LIVES VIOLATED BY? I MEAN IT WOULD BE FUNNY. IT WOULD BE FUNNY.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#cw blood#cw gore#jrwi suckening#jrwi suckening spoilers#vex waylin#viv waylin#MY FAVORIT EP!! HAVNT SEEN IT IN FOREVER THO BC WELL. IM BUSY. SO BEAR W ME IM RUNNIN OFF ALOTTA MEMORY FUMES#ALSO EDIT BC FUUUCK I HADMORE TAGS BUT TUMBLR FUCKEN ATE EM. OH WELL. MY DMS R OPEN IF U WANNA UNLOCK RAMBLES.#I LOVE THE WAYLIN TWINS SSSOO FUCKING MUCH IM SO!!! CURIOUS ABOUT THEM!!! WHO WERE THEY WHEN THEY WERE HUMAN? HOW LONGVE THEY BEEN ARND?#I LOVE IT WHEN PPL SAY ITS LIKE THESE TWO WERE MADE FOR MMEE BC YES!! YES!! ITS EVERYTHING I COULD EVER WANT FROMA CHARACTER!!!#I LOVE THEIR RED WHITE N BLACK COLOR SCHEME. I LOVE HOW THEYRE BOTH SO INTELLIGENT AND GENIUS N YET THEYRE DUMB AS FUUUUCK#COOOMICAL SUPER VILLAINS. OOH ILL GET YOU NEXT TIME SHAMIA SHAMAI!!! HOW DARE YOU FOIL MY PLAN!! MY PLANS OF MUTILATING AWAKE N ALIVE PPL#COMICAL AND YET. GENUINELY HORRIFYING. VIV CAN MAKE UR BONES EXPLODE JUST BY THINKING ABOUT IT. VEX CAN BECOME SOUP#WHY DONT WE TALK ABOUT THAT MORE? THE TURNING INTO RED MEAT SLIME?? METAL AS FUUUCK. I ALSO LOVE HOW SCARED THEY GOT SO QUICKLY#THIS LIL FUCKEN RRRRRAT COMES IN. AND WELL. HES JUST LIKE ALL THE OTHERS. WE FUCK HIM UP N TOSS HIM INTO THE SUN N LET HIM BURN#SURE HE HAD ONE MORE TRICK OF REBELLION UP HIS SLEEVE BUT THE SUN HAS TAKEN HIM NOW. ITS FINE. WE'RE FINE. HEY IS THERE SMTH IN THE CEILING#OHHH WE KILLED HIM ONCE N HE CAME BACK. WE KILLED HIM AGAIN N TOOK HIM APART BUT THEN HES BACK?? HE GETS AWAY AND THEN. COMES BACK. AGAIN.#WE CANT GET RID OF HIM. THAT FOUL SHAMIA SHAMAI. A MOUSE IN OUR KITCHEN. FUUUUCK HES GONNA SPREAD DISEASE! KILL IT! KILL IT!! AAAUUGH FUCK!#I LOVE THAT THE WAYLIN TWINS AGREED TO HELP THE BLONDE TWINS MOSTLY ON THE BASIS OF 'IT WOULD BE FUNNY' BUT ALSO#OOHHH WE ARE SO CLOSE TO REACHING SOMETHING TO MAKE HIM NNEEVER FUCK WITH US AGAIN. HIS ILLUSIONS WILL HAUNT US NO LONGER#THEY WERE SSSOOO PARANOID W ALL THE CAMERAS AND BOMBING THEIR OWN LAB AND RUNNING AND RUNNING AND GETTING AWWAY FROM THIS FUCKEN! MOUSE!!!!#OHHHH I THINK IM RUNNIN OUTA ROOM so ill talk about da art real quick.BEEN WORKIN ON THIS FOR A WHIIILE.ALOTTA THESE were started when the#ep came out.so OLD!! BUT DONE!!and im very very happy w my colors n gore n EXPRESSIONS!! the top right corner comic keeps making me chuckle#I ALSO rly love the lil convo between arthur n viv.theyre SO CUTE TOGETHERR they should go ona museum date together or somethin#they need more time to just talk abt da World together.ALSO CAN I BE PETTY.I MADE ARTHUR UGLY CORRECT-STYLE#THESE BOYS KNOW NOTHING OF UGLY.I MADE THE VAMPIRIC FLESH EVOLVE N ROT N BLOSSOM AND THERE IS SQUIRMING WITHIN THE TENEBRAE#UHHH IEAH THIS GUY W A ROTTED N DISTORTED FACE WALKS INTO MY BIKE STORE IEAH IM SCREAAAMIN LIKE WADDA HELL!! MONSTOR!!!
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How do we feel about Beach wear Noritoshi....
Everyone thinks he'd go covered head to toe wearing those wet suits divers use, but no. Noritoshi isn't the type to want to attract attention to himself when it's not needed, so he'd try to blend in. Emphasis on try.
He's the guy wearing a covering or some shit. I think you'd have to fight him to wear a translucent one. (if you splash him with water, you'll acheive the same effect thoughahahaha) even though it's a beach, he's trying to find an appropriate way to cover up, hes just like that. yes to sunscreen ofc. I can see him in a sun hat, but it's not his.. maybe he took it from one of the girls
HIS HAIR WOULD BE UP BC ITD BE TOO HOT AND THE SUN HAT WOULD HELP HIM FROM GETTING OVERHEATED H.H....H IS FACE WOULD BE FLUSHED BC OF THE HEAT AND. AND. AND.. he's like the beach babe on the shore, soaking up the sun and reading a book or smth. if you splash him with water, i can see him trying to get you back. then boom bam, hes in the water with everyone else.
OH FUCK that's even IF he goes to the beach. it's like seeing God in the flesh, idk man I'd go blind........... hed probably come along when he realizes theres hot people at the beach. he cant have you looking at people in that state, hold on hes going. give him five minutes..!
EXTRA
[untied covering version under the cut. like his booefjehsaf are out aha.]
ahahahahahahahahaa *froths at the mouth*
mf dont even begin to look at me like that
#kamo noritoshi#noritoshi kamo#noritoshi#kamo noritoshi x reader#noritoshi kamo x reader#noritoshi x reader#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#FAM IMA BE SO FR W YOU. ITS SO COLD WHERE I AM RN#AS OF POSTING THIS#BUT ITS FUCKING SUMMER SOMEWHERE OUT THERE SO LETS FUCKING GO#IM TELLING YOU WHEN I FUCKING SAW THIS ASK I FROZE#HOW ARE WE FEELING?????#FAM WE'RE FEELING FUCKING DEAD AND RESUSCITATED#GOD I FEEL LIKE YOU ANSWERED MY PRAYERS OR SOME SHIT BC I WANTED TO TAKE THIS MANS SHIRT OFF SO BAD BUT NEVER HAD A PROPER EXCUSE#OFFICER. GOD. TUMBLR STAFF.... THIS IS PURELY FOR THE SAKE OF ANDSWERING MY BELOVED CULT MEMBER'S QUESTION#I SWEAR THERE IS NO OTHER UNDERLYING REASON#OFFICER PLEASE#nah its embarrassing how hyped i got for this ask#you got me wide awake at 8 am bc of beach wear......#I WANTED TO SHOW HIS WAIST BUT THE FUCKING STUPID COVERING BLOCKED IT ALL.#WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO ME @ MYSELF?!??????#DOES THIS COUNT AS SUGGESTIVE????#NO. ITS JUST HIS CHEST. DONT LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT 👊💥💥👊💥👊💥💥#HOW COULD I FORGET ABOUT THE NORITOSHI THAT TEASES YOU BACK...... IM SUCH A FOOL. GOD STRIKE ME DOWN RN......#DUDE I DABBLED IN IT A BIT HERE BUT OH MY FUCK.... IT NEEDS AN ENTIRE POST OH FUCK#tysm anon I'll love you till my heart rots#you dont understand my devastation half way through when he kinda looked like beach geto. pinterest if you ever get your filthy paws on thi#and call him geto. istg ill gut you alive#null rot
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does anyone else have the thing where if you know you have to get up early the next morning you just... can't go to sleep
#loren talks#took me SO long to fall asleep and then i fucking 😭 woke up at 5:30#did my best to try and go back to sleep because the alarm isnt til 7:30 but#then my nose decided “no. we will sneeze”#so. im awake. the back to sleep chance is thoroughly gone#(have sneezing fits most mornings and it blasts all the sleep away)
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never have i been so entirely exhausted from sitting in front of a laptop in a dark room for three hours gay! and so full of delight and happiness! like wow! i have not felt this good in ages!! and its a good kind of tired! i feel like im glowing!
but shit, the update is more than i could've dreamed of. like i said - three straight hours of combing, and i probably still missed a thing or two! i'm even saving the storytime audio to enjoy in the morning, i haven't listened to it yet!
i already have so many thoughts and emotions but i'm... so wiped out oh my god lmao. so much new stuff at once! i need to sleep on it all! and in the morning i will be more than happy to reply, interact, answer asks on this subject, share my actual thoughts - i just need to take the rest of the night to Process and rest, yk yk
and i know i "missed" some links on my liveblog! i know i know! i didn't add every single thing i found - like most of the Wally audios - because i'll be compiling them all into a labeled post tomorrow! when i wake up! i'm already looking forward to it <3 i'm confident i personally found all of them, though! i was Thorough! i went through everything at least twice, i tabbed through, i clicked on Everything...
but yes i hope you all are having a wonderful Update Day/Evening/Morning/Afternoon As The Case May Be. this is truly a delight and again, more than i could've dreamed of. i'd forgotten what it's like to be so wholly excited and delighted by something! it's been so long since i've felt this kind of genuine joy and whimsy! usually im white-knuckling my optimism and happiness but tonight it was all authentic 100% non-forced From The Soul!
#a very exciting day of Not Much Happening and then Everything At Once#the constant (joyous) stress over the update and then the intense euphoria of experiencing it....#very very exhausted i have no energy left in me for literally anything#a sleep will fix that though#and ill be back to Chatter and Ramble#absolutely unprompted#scribble salad#i cant believe we're only at the very beginning... there is already So Much!#so much good stuff! incredible stuff! monumental work! i literally cant fathom that this is the Tip of the iceberg! what the fuck!#but thats something to swoon over another day#we have the update!#a plethora of audio clips and new information to chew on!#but yes yes i will make a tumblr post with all of the links#in order! labeled! for your convenience and viewing and reblogging pleasure!#and a different post with my personal thoughts and emotions! i have many!#alright yes stepping away from the laptop now#water. teeth. cats. sleep. yes. totally going to do that.#i already know im gonna lay down get cozy and then my eyes are gonna Fly Open. Wide Awake#perhaps i should take some melatonin lol#i want to be able to wake up in a timely manner Well Rested and ready to compile!!!#a melatonin night it is!#but yes i hope you all are having fun!!!#feel free to shoot me asks and such! i am more than happy to Respond and Discuss!#i will be making my main posts / sharing my thoughts before answering anything tho lol i will say that now#that way i can say my piece#and then if i get any asks about something ive already covered i can just Link the Post!#for ease of all of us <3#but yes goodnight!!!#i cant wait to scribble and talk and AGH!!!#to clown and everyone working on welcome home you guys are the fucking most and its just. its everything
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Fell back asleep for a while (still have a horrible headache btw) and I had the most disturbing dream that I'm going to tell you guys about in the tags
#so i was on a road trip with a bunch of people i dont even know and there were like 10 of us packed into a van#and they were so fucking loud and my head was hurting even in my dream so i was like CAN EVERYONE PLEASE SHUT THE FUCK UP#and we get to this hotel or like house place thats like a hotel#amd we go inside and i go check the fridge and there was a thick lemonade snoothie looking drink in this clear pitcher in the fridge#and i pulled it out and look inside and there was a live fucking lizard in there all covered in the smoothie stuff trying to escape#and i was like damn i should let that outside in a minute#but i went to looks for meds first bc like i said my head was hurting even in my dream#and when i come back the pitcher is empty (no lizard no smoothie stuff)#and i was like ...... did someone drink this??#and this guy was like nah that was cake batter i put in the oven#and i was like YOU FUCKING PUT IT WHERE????#so i get this sheet pan out of the oven and there is a half baked cake and in the middle was the lizard all charred and dead looking#and i was like fuck dude you killed it#but then#BUT THEN#the fucking lizard gets up and jumped out of the cake batter and starts speed running around the place like up on the walls and ceiling#and it seemed pissed as hell#like rightfully so bc someone tried to bake it into a cake but still#so i was running around trying to stay away from it bc i got the impression that it would bite whoever it got close to#and then i woke up and for a second it felt like something was crawling on me#and i had a small/brief panic as i checked the bed for any lizards (there was nothing there)#and now im awake and my head hurts even worse and my throat hurts and my body hurts and its very possible that im sick
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for like 3 weeks i was wondering why i was sleeping so much and felt listless. and just now I managed to email 3 people and responded to a month old message in the span of an hour because I got back to TAKING MY FUCKIN MEDS..........
#MOTHER FFFFUCKER#to be fair. my doc said I could stop taking them while im on break since i wouldnt need to be constantly pumped on stimulants#im not sure if it was a side effect but i managed to take like 3 different naps in one day and STILL managed to sleep thru the whole night#at least 2 days into my break. the weird thing is i didnt feel more or less rested afterwards. but mentally i think im in a good place rn#to really put the level of awakeness im at rn i feel weirdly confident i could start one piece. also bc of that sick new opening it BANGS#the song is really good and im in love with the animation style. did some digging and it seems one of the lead animators is masato mori#but i could be wrong. it seems he also did some work on mp100 which could explain a lot lol.. he uses smear frames really well to convey#consistent movement and fluidity!!! someone else might have done color design but it works really really well esp with odas style!!#just love the overall vibe and aesthetic and id really love to study it and incorporate a bit of it into my art.. especially the thick#outlines which i think helps to separate characters and objects on screen. though i have to say the style is definitely more suited to#animation bc of the simpleness and smears. maybe that will help me explore shapes and perspective when i draw... i wanna get better#at drawing poses and angles but i have a hard time wrapping my head around space and using perspective guide lines NGHHHH#i wonder if it has to do with my dogshit ability to judge distance. not depth perception but like. judge how far smth is in metres etc#im also wearing an N95 for the first couple weeks back bc of the wave. absolutely NO BODY is wearing a mask its so fucking over#where im sitting ive heard 5 different people coughing probably not into their elbows!!! and im just. head in my fucking hands#there was a kid sitting a couple seats away in class coughing as he pleases and i wanted to grab him in a chokehold so badly. PLEASEE#ive been annoying my family by asking them to mask up and reminding them to bring masks when they go out and showing them news articles#but at least its working bc we ordered some KN95s and my mom is at least taking me seriously so. please dont be afraid to speak up abt your#health. take care of yourself and others however u can!! wear that mask indoors at your maskless friends house!!! stay home when u can!!#im wearing a surgical mask at home too bc my parents have '''a dry throat cough''' and they are so bad at coughing into their sleeves#also im pretty sure dry throat isnt transmissible bc my brother started coughing too so.. i also tested negative but they havent tested yet#im also not a doctor but i have to keep reminding ppl whenever i can that covid and flu work differently. covid is new and too recent to#have nearly as much research done on it. it seems its also compounding so instead of building immunity it weakens the body and spreads to#to other systems which might explain brain fog and muscle weakness. i remember someone early in the pandemic got infected and it messed up#their smell/taste receptors so bad that they cant eat most foods and that stays in the front of my mind when i think abt covid. christ#yapping
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this is also why i stopped using my tracked tag for a while tbh
#and i might do it again bc its just#a reminder that no one rly cares abt what i do / who i am etc#which might sound over dramatic idk how else to describe it tho its just hollow#it feels very much like a Chore and a Task and if i dont reblog things fast enough from my tag#people get very angry and/or upset with me even tho theres just#so much content and i have 0 time so everything gets queued no matter what#like this whole experience feels like a chore lmao#and it never ever used to#but now theres so much animosity if i dont behave / interact with things Properly#or whatever the make believe rules are idk#this dash can just be so negative like have we all truly descended into madness during this hiatus#bc like i get it ive been up and down and all around too but ive never been straight up MEAN to anyone in this community#and i never want to either so this entire situation thats been bubbling for months just feels like shit#bc what the fuck changed and how do we get back to where we were#i never ever ever ever felt this way before like idk the middle of last year#but ever since like last fall its just been idk. Bad#once again im sorry if ive ever done anything to upset anyone but my silence / absence doesnt mean i dont care#ive just been Incredibly busy due to some real life changes that are out of my control#i might not have energy to answer everything but i do Read everything and it does make me smile#and i save messages that are kind in my heart so i can be reminded of the root of what this blog is supposed to be#a space for something im very passionate about and previously had nowhere else to express said passion#so like idk if we all like the same things why does this weird feeling of competition linger over us lmao#why do all ccs have to fight???? each other???? when we all love and do the same things????#i have nothing against anyone personally but what i Do take issue with is the way that ive been doing this since 2021 and im fully just#ignored and shoved aside by so many people for reasons i fully dont know or understand#so yeah idk this is a novel i just woke up from a spontaneous nap bc im so exhausted i can only stay awake for 3 hours at a time#but yeah anyways idk !#be nice its so easy !#tbd
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i miss when i got a full uninterrupted sleep daily
#living with jade and sleeping in their room us nice only to be close ro them#otherwise i really really really hate it lol they snore so much and thendoor is kept open and uts soo fucking loud downstairs and#jade will just wake up occasionally slme days and move around for hours adkusting positions and wakjng me up every time or j#just hours of coughing as loud as possible without muffling it at all#or hours of snoring#and rhen they wake up too much and are awake from the day now even if it's two am and theyre gonna pass out at 12 now snd fuck up any plan#we have for the next day#and if its not jade its the cats#or my mom#i miss when i could just fucking sleep for eight hours without anyone or anything waking me up#i am also a very light sleeper and im fucked when im awoken lile this so hopefully I can fall back asleep haha its 3 am haha#textpost#kill me now pls#this is a form of torture#and also i feel guilty whenever i jyst go back to my bedroom
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Without getting too much into detail the thought of my ex trying to contact me again is a huge-ass nightmare scenario to me but at least it's unlikely he'll try again atp. I have also gotten panicked over the worry that he might worm his way back into the spaces I'm in and I'd have to like, end up explaining The Lore to people I have gotten to know but who weren't around for it. So they know I'm not just being a dick to some random guy if it were to ever come up. Which like, actually it's really funny to me that the current fixation I have is adjacent to an interest I know he had. I don't know if that'd translate into him ending up in the little fandom circle I've carved out but if it did I'd probably throw up and cry Lol.
#ventings#emetophobia#the adjacent thing comes from newgrounds thats all i wanna say#i hate talking abt my ex publicly just cuz i feel like im jinxing myself into having him show back up. eugh#i might see if i can talk to my bestie abt the specifics i kinda wanna. just share these thoughts with someone#and im not close to a lot of people ! and itd be easiest with my bestie cuz he was There for like. the whole thing#they know just how much it like. messes with me. god im still so fucking. thankful for when she was up so fucking late#with me talking to me after we broke up past fucking midnight#i still remember being awake through the night until 7am and it was awful but they were there. literally the most important#person in my life FUCK IM TEARING UP THINKING ABOUT IT ALL. they deserve an award for putting up w 13-14 y/o me
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woke up randomly in the night and my flatmate is in the bathroom so I can't go pee and immediately go back to sleep incident 7493 dead 19923 casualties
#GIRL PLEASE ITS BEEN 15 MINS. I NEED TO FALL BACK ASLEEP STAT I HAVE TO BE UP FOR WORK IN 3 HOURS. EMERGENCY!!!!!#ik shes not working today so she can do whatever with her schedule but i cant fall asleep again until i peeeee#and the longer im awake the harder it is for me to fall asleep. and ive been so fucking tired latelt already come on 💔💔#actually come to think of it the reason i woke up so suddenly is probably cuz i heard her door slamming#which is fine she can move around the flat whenever she likes. not like shed stop for me anyway. but hurry tf up in there#whats she DOING. if shes taking a bath or showering im fucked. maybe i should just piss in the kitchen sink lmao#UGHHHHH.#.diaries#well all we can do is wait. man im gonna feel like so much shit at work today :(
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i did tell you people i met a they might be giant right.
#I DONT THINK I DIDDDDDD like an insane person i left out one of the most bonkers moments of my california vacation#saying it now makes it seem like im making this up and the following story will seem made up but dude just trust me.#im fucking. ok sunday morning the morning of Thee Concert and i (used to waking up at 4-5 am) have been awake on and off since like 6 am#my friend? asleep.#now i enjoy waking up and falling back asleep for a couple of hours however by like 9:30 im starving i need BREAKFAST#like the very nice friend that i am i dont wake my friend up i let him sleep and leave him a message on my open laptop screen#because the fucking hotel room doesnt have a pad of paper?? so i leave my modern post it note of a message#saying that im going out for croissants and coffee#because im an idiot i severely misjudge how hot it's already gotten in los angeles in july#ive chosen to wear jeans (bad idea) and a long sleeve flowy black shirt (worse idea)#i also dont look my Greatest because my friend had been telling me dont wash ur hair before we curl it for the concert!!!#so this is my hair after flying in and everything the day before (It Needs To Be Washed)#im following google maps to the coffee place as i brave the streets of los angeles on a sunday morning#hollywood boulevard around the chinese theatre is insane btw. insane. but being from new york i am unfazed (well. a little fazed)#i am Sweating. its already gotta be 80 degrees. im also reaching critical hunger levels. but i continue on my journey#google maps leads me down a sidestreet and tells me to turn down some alley and im like well thats not right.#so i turn to go back the way i was headed and find another way to get to the coffee place#as i turn and head back up theres a guy going down this same block heading in my direction#i look at him and im like hey that guy kinda looks like oh my god it actually is him. mr john l of tmbg fame#and so i have a split second decision of like do i sayyyyyy something do i just ignore him while geeking out#somehow i decide to be bold and im just like gdjgmm hi excuse me i recognize you uh do you mind if i could get a photo#he was very nice and suggested we move into the shade and i took the photo trying to turn off google maps before i did#and i was like aa im seeing you in concert 2nite love your music thank u! and we went on our way.#i think i kinda like. stopped for a moment before i went on to the cafe and was like. that just happened??????? insane. but it gets better#i do finally get the coffees n croissants btw and get back to the hotel after melting in the heat#and my friend who likes tmbg better was losing his mind once i finally told him#so the following morning after our spars concert insanity we have breakfast at a diner and then head back to our hotel#and he's wearing a tmbg shirt he got and im in a spars shirt and as we're walking back a car horn honks near us#AND ITS BOTH THEY MIGHT BE GIANTS IN A CAR and they say hi and are like we like your shirts!#and my friend and i are like losing it but trying to be cool and like oh thabk you we loved your show hi! so theres my insane story
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My doctor messaging me at 12:30 in the morning to tell me she wants to do a telehealth visit abt the side effects I'm having with my new Lamotrigine dose (including worse insomnia than my usual insomnia, as u may have guessed lmao) is. something.
#text post#like i know why i am awake babe why are YOU awake this late#and god why do we have to do another visit#they aren't bad enough to make me stop this dose and i haven't been on the new dose long enough to let it even out#can i not just Not have to do another uncomfortable visit where even if things turn out okay after#i later feel like I'm still not being wholly trusted/treated like i know my body and how i feel#i had worse side effects restarting this med months ago and we didn't have any additional visits for that#they fucking forgot to even book me for a f/u and i had to call in and beg for one basically#and then they misbooked it for the wrong reason and with the wrong doctor#and made it out like it was my fault when i made clear i begged and told the receptionist i spoke to to book said appt#that it needed to b with my doc for the Lamotrigine and that i hadn't been told when to follow up so i was just. doing it#bc she said i needed to but then didn't say when to book it#they're trying hard and im trying to give them grace but then this shit happens and like#im tired. makes me want to go into my new doc like nah never mind im fine. don't ask me nothing and i won't bug you with anything#unless im dying or nearly dead already.#would suck beyond believe attempting to raw dog life mostly again but goddamn. im so sick of this lack of stability with my care#anyway. probably an appt next Tuesday which is great#that's the week of the weekend that i work again and the week before my bday#(a bday I'll be working now which I'm not normally irked abt but. i am a bit rn)#so cool. yeah. let's stack anxiety and fear over a medical appt on top of everything else for that week#and that's not counting that this weekend I've been tasked with buying and getting signed a v expensive and rare figure#for my mum's bf and I'm kind of terrified im gonna fuck it up#he paid for tickets to the con the figure will be sold at and that the person he wants to sign it will be at#so if i fuck this up he'll want (understandably) to be paid back asap for that#and that's money i don't fucking have rn#i really wish she had waited till the actual day proper to contact me bc i couldn't sleep before this#and now i definitely cant bc like#it's dumb. but what if she takes my med away. it isn't perfect but it works better than any other med I've tried#what if she wants me to try a new one. i cant do that and b dealing with major side effects during the intense work schedule#that'll be happening for me v soon and then into November
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😭😭😭😭🥲🥲😭😭🇮🇪😭🇮🇪😭😭I DIDNT MEAN TO PRESS THE IRISH FLAGS help me my 9am class got cancelled but of course i wake up and dont check my email this one morning and got ready like annidiot I COULDVE GONE BACK TO SLEEEEEP
#well im lucky i got told as we were leaving the house and didnt show up to a cancelled class#BUT MY EYES BURN SO BAD AND I KNOW I CAN FALL BACK ASLEEP BECAUSE I HAVE STUPID AWAKE DISEASE OR SOMETHING. WAAAAUGH#cant. i Cant fal back asleep. I got cursed by a fucking wizard or domething in rhat i physically cant nap and cant sleep in past noon#IM NOT A MORNING PERSON. I JUST WAKE UP AND CANT SLEEP MORE. FUCK OFF. I NEED 11 HOURS.#Like my stupud gay cat.
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my mom sitting there nodding along to my very emotional retelling of how i was chased by my classmate (actually my crush but she doesn't have to know that) who kept shoving a dead lizard in my face in ninth grade
#tp#might sound silly now but i genuinely felt like i was about to die from the stress of it#i hated him after that#he deliberately did that because i told them i was scared of lizards#had the gulls to laugh at me losing my absolute shit too that bastard#laugh as i shove the stick higher up your ass then how bout it#i could have grabbed a chair and given him a high five with it on his face#but being the bigger person i am i just cried in the bathroom afterwards bye 🚶🚶#and then i realized i was being bullied 😭😭 took me a while to clock that#i cant believe i used to like him im so done actually#comparing him and the guy im now very much enamoured by ... the difference is in the actions#god he bought me overpriced coffee at ten in the night outside bc he thought i could need company#and he was RIGHT goddamn it that guy#'i didnt know if you liked it with sugar or not so i brought two just in case' are you shitting me you're an angel#walked me around and talked me out of feeling like utter shit for two whole hours god im falling for my quote unquote therapist friend#i havent seen him for four five months im going through withdrawal#and then when we were back at the hotel and i stayed up reading a book at the lobby he came down and said he would sit with me#and he would stay awake just in case because he noticed a creep at our floor im going to fucking SOB#and obviously i couldnt make him stay up for me so i said okay i would go back to my room so he wouldnt have to worry#AND YOU KNOW WHAT HE DID???#he made sure i entered my room and closed the door safe and sound before going back down the hallway to his ⁉️⁉️#DO YOU NOT SEE HOW PERFECT HE IS
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Funniest old timey expression is saying you are 'with child' when you're excitedly anticipating something, can you imagine if we brought that back
'Dude, you looking forward to going out to the party tomorrow night?'
'Yeah bro it's gonna be so fucking good; i'm like, totally preggers about it'
#my boyfriend love of my life that he is has begun reading post captain to me#and i belieeeeeve its stephen who uses the phrase in this way#congratulations to mr maturin#anyway can you imagine if we were all out here like 'oh fuck im so excited im gonna lay an EGG about it!!!'#its just very funny is the thing ok.#also im like half doubting if i remembered this line right and if i got it wrong#you're not allowed to make fun of me my bf isnt awake yet for me to quiz OK!!!!!!!#u have to be nice to me when it is bf-less hours bc i get 50% stupider w/o the power of gay loce#*love. watever!! pease and love on planet earf bring back funny oldtime phrases
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